There are days where I feel like the ultimate ringmaster, juggling everything in a harmonious fashion. Then there are days where things are so out of control it feels like trying to herd wild cats. (Why anyone would attempt such a fools errand I know not.) In short, things have been busy and there are days where I feel that I have everything covered in contrast to the days where I fell I lacked.
The thing is, busy can be good in some aspect and bad in another. It's good when things are being checked off at such a rate of speed that productivity moves in a blur. It's bad when there is much movement but a lack in progress. So in the midst of these I have to continually monitor my personal goals, a check list of sorts, to ensure I am moving forward. The feeling of being unproductive can sit on ones enthusiasm, causing them to be stagnant.
It is in this rush that it appears to me that part of my problem is asking for help. Not as a source of pride, or feeling that asking is beneath me. But rather it is the feeling of inconveniencing the person of whom I am asking. Some of you may do this as well, you think about calling to ask a person and as soon as the thought comes you wonder, "What if they are busy doing...?" If that is you know that you are not alone!
When I first started doing this show I found myself trying to do it all unintentionally. If someone didn't get back fast enough, or didn't appear interested I would just do it. And in doing so I found my schedule getting packed and time slipping away. It wasn't until recently that someone asked to edit a show for me, and helped my eyes to come open. They not only exceeded my expectation in how fast they did it, but they helped clear my day to focus on other important things.
This experience taught me the importance of the saying, "No man is an island." We aren't meant to take everything on as a solo project, and I now know the power in letting go. Trusting people to handle things will make you vulnerable to some degree, but if placed in the right person it can make a world of difference. Spreading yourself too thin, over-working yourself, is not only a hazard to your health physically but can be draining mentally as well. Not to mention you may miss out on the chance of having someone do the job better than you could yourself.
I am grateful to have learned this lesson early on in this process. I still have a lot to learn, and will admit that when it comes to TMDS there is room for improvement. But no matter what I intend to make content that I believe in, and overcome the obstacles that would hinder me. Pray for me that wisdom would prevail, and that God would grant me the knowledge on how to delegate tasks thoroughly. Believe it or not, your support means more to me than many of you know. Thanks for joining me on this journey, and I hope meet your expectations.